Ann Williams
3 min readJan 10, 2024

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Deconstruction is falling without a parachute

This might well be the reason so many people believe in various religions and why they don’t leave even when they realize they’ve been punked by old patriarchal systems used to control the commoners. We yearn for community, affirmation, and the thrill of hunting for undiscovered treasure within a text that is believed to be sacred.

I think it is crucial to recognize the difference between religion as a ceiling and religion as a floor.

Wherever good exists, evil seeks to corrupt it. In the case of Christianity, which was originally about knowing God, this has often taken the form of legalism, e.g., if you don't subscribe to propositions A, B & C, or perform actions X, Y & Z, then you're going to Hell -- or, at least, must necessarily live in mortal terror of eternal torment.

When people realize the flaws in these limitations to knowing God, they sometimes toss the whole kit-and-kaboodle; and I think this can be a mistake. This is because, no matter how finely-woven the shroud of evil obscuring good is, God can penetrate between the warp and woof of the weave. Flowers can grow in Auschwitz, and love can grow anywhere.

I spent some time in the Catholic church, which was the most healing experience of my Christian life. I no longer subscribe to certain elements of its dogma; but I am also utterly certain because of personal experience that God is living and active in the Catholic church. In addition, there have been Saints in its history whose spirituality has been profound; and one thing I have learned is that there is a context in which surrender to divine authority is more important than being doctrinally correct. Obeying your parents, for example, even when they don't have the whole picture, can be more correct than rebelling against their authority when you actually do know better, because surrender can be a greater good than doctrinal rectitude.

This last point is violently antithetical to modern thinking, which is built on the basis of post-Enlightenment rationalism. It presupposes that truth is reducible to rational analysis, which, of course, it can never be.

So, when people assail religions, or religion in general, because it believes this or does that, I think they're missing the point. The real question is, can I find God there? and, because of God's grace and love, the answer is often, Yes. That doesn't make what the religion teaches right; but what the religion teaches isn't the point. Knowing God is the point; everything else is merely commentary.

Perhaps what the author mourns having lost and sees in Blessed Becky is the simplicity of faith -- which does not refer to "what you believe," but rather refers to trust in a Person. Becky may be getting all kinds of things wrong; but she has joy nonetheless because she knows and loves God. This is coming to Jesus as a little child. Chances are, she studies her Bible, not to *be* right, but to be *right*; she seeks perfection for His sake, not for her own. That's what it means to love God.

Many of us were raised to fear God, to seek to *be* right out of fear of eternal damnation. That spirit is from Hell. The spirit from Heaven, on the other hand, seeks to be *right*, and experiences joy in divine intimacy. Certainty is a matter of, not what you believe, but trusting and loving the One you know.

Perhaps that's what the author misses.

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Ann Williams
Ann Williams

Written by Ann Williams

Trans woman living on an island of reason in a sea of hysteria.

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