I am a trans woman, attracted to men; so, that is the context in which I write.

For most of my life, I didn't know I was trans; and, for much of it, I assumed that the few times when I thought a guy was hot were simply manifestation of they Kinseyian principle that very few people are 100% gay or straight -- that most people fall somewhere in-between.

As I say, for most of my life -- including nearly two years after knowing I was trans -- I thought I was female-attracted. It took a very strange event to show me otherwise -- and, about a year more to divorce myself from the behaviors I learned over the 50 previous years that oriented me toward women.

I want to say a few things here that will be easily misconstrued.

First, biology tells us that the natural order of things is for biological men and biological women to connect. People like me, and gay people, are deviations from the model. That doesn't mean they're at fault, or that they should try to behave like what they're not. Look, people are born blind, deaf, unable to walk ... but that doesn't mean it was supposed to be that way. It's obvious from the way we are designed that we are meant to see, hear, walk ... and be straight. That's simply biology. But that doesn't mean that birth defect don't happen. Babies are born blind, deaf, unable to walk, with spina bifida, etc. -- none of which was "according to plan," yet all of which happen. Does that mean these people are somehow worth less than others? Absolutely not!! It just means that it's better for the person affected if they can see, hear, etc.

We need to stop judging others for the faults we see in them. They see gay and trans people as morally depraved; we see judgmental people as morally depraved. Why don't we both just forget about it? None of us is perfect; all of use are flawed. Why don't we all just get over ourselves?