I think all of us go through this at some point or another.

I've addressed this frequently in online discussions. "Am I really trans?" is the wrong question.

The real question isn't what you are, but how you need to see yourself and live. What we "are" is ultimately unanswerable -- a merry-go-round of doubt and pain that you can ride forever unless you decide to simply get off. It can be an interesting philosophical question for a winter night in front of the fire; but it's not necessary, and a great distraction.

Am I a woman or "transgender"? Who knows? I need to see myself as a woman and live as a woman; but, ultimately, I can't prove it, even to myself. I just know I need to do it to have any kind of life at all.

Both sides of transgender issues very often become lost in the weeds over unprovable (and undisprovable) assertions, fighting to the death over a mere conflict of visions. And, in our own lives, we do the same to ourselves when we obsess over things we cannot prove or disprove.

The next time it comes up, either with others or within yourself, just laugh, shrug, say, "Who knows? This is just the way I need to live."