I think there's a problem with your analysis.

First of all, I am trans myself, and misgendering can drive me up a wall. I don't enjoy it, either.

That being said, if I try to force someone else to gender me correctly, I am imposing my belief system on him. How I see myself is not about him; how he chooses to see me is.

The demands of courtesy aren't really demands; they're more suggestions. As Wesley Snipes said in "Demolition Man," you can't take away people's rights to be assholes.